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unfashions for unfluencers

Every purchase now features unfree shipping*

We all know free shipping doesn’t really exist—someone always pays for it—so we don’t try to blow smoke up your ass by saying we offer free shipping. Fact is, we feature the latest thing.

Unfree shipping.

To find out more about unfree shipping, there is a link in the footer of this page that will explain it in detail and expose the pernicious personal perils inherent in the concept of free shipping. You will never think about shipping the same again.

Your pen pal,
Repar T

mirror moments

Eventually everything comes down to you being you because everyone else is already taken (hat tip to Oscar Wilde). When this happens you eventually have to start spending time alone with your self, and that's scary for some folks. When you find yourself alone with your self, it helps to be able to say the right things, so your self will like you. This collection of reparTEES is all the things your self likes to hear (and read!). When you're alone, just walk over to a mirror and you've instantly got some good company. To get things started, all you have to do is read what's on that chest in the mirror right out loud, and then look into your eyes looking into your eyes, and let yourself know you really mean it. There's magic in mirror moments. Don't pass 'em up. Make sure you have at least one of these reparTEES on hand... just in case you get left alone with your self.


Your pen pal,
Repar T

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