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unfashions for unfluencers

Every purchase now features unfree shipping*

We all know free shipping doesn’t really exist—someone always pays for it—so we don’t try to blow smoke up your ass by saying we offer free shipping. Fact is, we feature the latest thing.

Unfree shipping.

To find out more about unfree shipping, there is a link in the footer of this page that will explain it in detail and expose the pernicious personal perils inherent in the concept of free shipping. You will never think about shipping the same again.

Your pen pal,
Repar T

rocket man

He's known to the world as Elon, but I mostly call him Rocket Man. He's over fifty years old now and he's still just a bad boy who is entertained by trying to get away with mooning anyone who even looks like they want to try to make him do something he doesn't want to do. Still, somewhere in the mess he calls his life, is a brilliant mind. He's a great friend, but I still wish he had a little more depth as a human being.

Your pen pal,
Repar T

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